Opperation lose 40 pounds.

Helloooooo, Christmas. I love you, but why is it I eat so much food when you're around?

So, I've made sort of a New Year's resolution ... as many of you know I'm the maid of honor in my friends (and many of your friends), Sarah and Paul's, wedding in July. My goal is to lose 40 pounds by this wedding. I'm doin' it.

From now on, it's workout and write down everything I eat every day.

Luckily, I have great friends like Courtney who will compete with me to help me keep on track. I'm sure I'll be writing lots of curse words when I can't have chocolate cake in a couple of months :D

Do you guys have any goals? Wanna compete with me and Court? Let me know! :D

"I hope my best years are when I'm 80"

I've been thinking a lot lately (being unemployed leaves you with a lot of time to think), about where my life is headed and "what will I be doing in five years, months, weeks ... hell, what will I be doing in five days?" And it's made me think about something you hear a lot when you're in high school and then sometimes again in college. I'm talking about the phrase "these are the best years of your life." I remember hearing that once when I was in high school and thinking

"SHIT, really? I'm 18. Is this REALLY as good as my life is going to get?"

Like, for real:

• Who really believes that?
• Do people really believe that?
• If not, why do they say it?
• If so, what in the WORLD are they going to do for the next 40-60 (or however many) years?

Are things like homecoming and prom supposed to be better than your wedding day? Or better than the day your first child is born? Or better than the feeling of owning your own home? I HOPE NOT! What about having a curfew? I don't know about you guys, but I had an early curfew. Know what happened as soon as I started college? My curfew went away. That's certainly an improvement. I would love to hear someone's argument about how the time when I had a curfew and had to go to prom was better than the life I live now. I just don't think it's a debate I would lose.

So, these thoughts have lead to a sub thought-process about people I know who are stuck living exactly the same way they did when they were in high school. I come from a small community and I think anyone from a small community knows people like this. I'm talking about the people who have never made friends outside of the ones they have had their whole lives, or at least since high school. The people who will NEVER change or grow or expand their knowledge, even if they are some of the smartest people you know. I don't want anyone to get confused and think I'm saying it's bad when people want to stay in the town they grew up in, that's not at all what I'm saying. I'm saying: Try new things. Expand what you know. MEET NEW PEOPLE. I've known one of my best friends since preschool, another since about 1st grade, two since 8th grade and one since early in high school; I believe it's OK to keep your friends, I'm just saying - don't forget about the other BILLIONS of people in the world. I met a guy the other day who said it was his goal for next year to meet as many new friends as possible. And, I like his style. I like it a lot.

I think I will make another vow now. One to go along with my vow to smile more and just try to be a happier person. I believe I do a pretty good job at meeting new people. I can make friends pretty much anywhere, so, I vow to live each day like it is bound to be better than the one before it. I hope my best years are when I'm 80. I want the rest of my years to be great, but I want something to look forward to. Something to keep me going. And I have a pretty great life now, so if it just keeps getting better, I'll be a pretty lucky girl.

xoxo! try it with me ;)

ps. If you don't meet people well, you should try that too. I know a lot of cool people and it's awesome!

"Been hit wit a few shells, but I don't walk wit a limp"

Thank you, 50 Cent, for writing those lyrics so I can use them for as a metaphor for my life.



So, I watch a lot of TV. It's one of the things I do to keep myself from remembering I'm unemployed. And, I noticed that this week it seemed like all of the shows were all about "choosing happiness." So, I started thinking, is it really that easy? Can a person CHOOSE happiness? My friend Brian really thinks you can. Last time we talked, we talked about choosing to be happy for like, a half hour.

If you're reading this, it's likely that you know me pretty well. And if you know me, you know I've been kind of out of my element for a few months. OK, several months. It started before graduation when I realized I had no idea what I wanted to do and only got worse from there. I could go on and on about how I've dropped most of my friends, or about how my love life has been nonexistent. But you know what, I don't want to any more. I've made choices. I know who I care about. The people I care about, I talk to and see as often as possible.

Christian, are you going to wrap this up or at least make a point?

Yes, I am.

What I'm saying is, I'm going to be happy. Right now, that's what I choose. If I'm sad I'm just going to smile. Supposedly, if you just smile you will be happy. (You can read about that here.)

Thanks for making it this far.

Failures

So, I got a call this morning. From one of the 100 newspapers I've sent my portfolio to — they filled the position. At least they called ... that's what Jamie says.

In other job-search news: I have started to build my online portfolio. It's just taking some time because I'm working my way through learning Dreamweaver.

Why can't I keep my car clean ... or a beat?

• Every day, I pick up my 15-year-old sister from high school.
• Every day, I get there a few minutes early (so I can avoid the high school drivers).
• Every day, I watch the high schoolers flood from the building at 3:15 (and 30 seconds).

I watch them as they run to "their" cars, as they get in, turn up the music (as loud as it could possibly go) and speed away. Every time I see them I just notice how awesome they think they are. They smoke their cigarettes, they smile and wave at their friends as they drive past them. Some of them look so concentrated on where they're going, they're not even taking in the moment. I'm sure whatever is going on in their life is uber important (not), but why can't they just take it in? Why are we so incapable of realizing what we have before it is gone?

Sometimes, I think this way too. Sometimes, I think the world revolves around me. Sometimes, I catch myself walking around campus with my friends, assuming everyone wonders about us — assuming everyone cares about our story.
Why are we giggling? Where are we going? How do we know each other?

Why do we we feel so big, when really, we're so small?

We all do it. We all assume people care about us.
Actually, some of us assume no one cares about us.
Which is worse?
I'm not sure.

"R" for ridiculous

There are several things about my life which would probably be considered insane (ridiculous) by most people. For instance I am absolutely obsessed with my best friends. Not just in the I-really-love-them-and-want-to-spend-all-kinds-of-time-with-them way, but in the I-can't-go-24-hours-before-I-start-missing-their-faces way and the I-spend-all-day-every-day-talking-to-them way.

(this is us ash, kb, me and court)

Also, I really like comic book movies.

• Spider man (all of them)
• Batman (I really like the new ones because they're so dark and kind of scary)
• x-men (that's right. I said it. Judge me.)
• I like all kinds of others, but I'm sick of this list
  

Other things - I L-O-V-E hats. So many hats!
Crazy hats. :)

More other things - I love silly teen-type books. Georgia Nicholson is a hysterical crazy British teenager who is very self centered, but also hilarious. The 10th and final book is coming out very soon. I'm so obsessed with it, I have ordered three copies of the movie, which was NOT released in the US. amazon.co.uk - my new favorite site! :)


More, more, more - I think Laffy Taffy jokes are the best :)

We're almost to the end - For as much as I love the English language, I am a terrible speller. As a journalist/English student I have a lot of friends who LOVE to play games like Scrabble. But, I usually avoid it because of my inability to correctly spell cool words!

welcome - half second lag time

"Welcome"

If you are going to read my blog, you should know; this picture is how I generally see life: upside down.

Yesterday my dad, sister and I were having a talk about saying things then immediately wishing you could take it back. I am positive we are not the only people to have ever had this conversation, but we had it anyway. After my sister blurted out one of her usual make-everyone-think-I'm-much-dumber-than-I-am statements during breakfast and my dad and I spent five minutes laughing at her expense I decided it would be really nice if there was .5 second lag time on everything you say. You know, like live television. In my opinion; if you say something and you do not really mean it, you immediately want to take it back - however, if you say something and within .5 seconds you have not regretted it, you probably meant it (somewhere inside). So, what I think is, everyone should have a half-second window to decide if he or she really wants to say "that." If the answer is "no," simply swat your statement away and start fresh.

Do you no think the world would be a much happier place?

Also, I learned a life lesson today (I usually do everyday): Wearing red sparkly hats is an easy way to make new friends and also lift spirits.



Seriously, put that sucker on and you're immediately smiling like a loon (probably because you look like one.) However, word to the wise - sometimes the friends you attract are even bigger loons than what you look like, watch out for those.



that's right ... take it in ... he's spidey :)